How to split night shifts with your partner and share one baby log

Two parents who both wake for every feed end up equally exhausted. One protected stretch of several hours of sleep each is usually worth more than two broken nights. Splitting also makes the work visible: who did what is written down, not argued about.

There is no perfect split. The right one depends on how the baby is fed, who goes back to work first, and how each of you copes with broken sleep. Treat the first plan as an experiment and change it after a week.

• Two halves. One parent covers from bedtime to around 2 AM, the other from 2 AM to morning. The off-duty parent sleeps in another room with earplugs if possible.
• Breastfed baby. The breastfeeding parent feeds; the other does everything else — bringing the baby, changing the diaper before or after, burping, settling and putting the baby back down. If you are also pumping, the partner can give one bottle of expressed milk so the breastfeeding parent gets a longer block; ask your midwife or lactation consultant first, especially in the early weeks while supply settles.
• Bottle-fed or mixed. Shifts can be fully separate. Prepare bottles and supplies for the night before bed so whoever is up does not have to think.
• Alternate nights. Some couples take whole nights in turn, especially once feeds are further apart.

Whatever you choose, keep the baby's sleep space safe on every shift: on the back, on their own flat surface, and back in their own bed after a feed.

1. 1Keep the log in one agreed place, by the baby or on the fridge door.
2. 2Before going to sleep, the outgoing parent writes the last feed, side or amount, the last diaper and anything unusual.
3. 3The incoming parent reads it before the next feed, instead of waking the other to ask.
4. 4In the morning, both look at the night together for one minute: how many feeds, the longest sleep, anything to tell the doctor.

Keep it short so it actually gets filled in: time; feed (side or amount); diaper (wet, dirty or both); sleep start and end; and a note column. Add an initial so you both know who logged what. If a grandparent or nanny helps, they write in the same log.

• Count all the work, not just feeds: washing bottles, laundry, cooking and the morning shift with a crying baby count too.
• Re-plan when something changes: a return to work, a growth spurt, a cold.
• Protect the person recovering from birth. Their healing and sleep come first in the early weeks.
• Talk about how you feel, not just the schedule. Exhaustion makes everyone short-tempered.

Constant low mood, anxiety that will not switch off, or feeling unable to cope can be signs of postnatal depression or anxiety, in either parent. Talk to your doctor or midwife; it is common and treatable. And never drive or hold the baby somewhere you might fall asleep when you are dangerously tired.

Baton is built for exactly this: one log for your baby on two phones. Invite your partner with an iCloud link; each of you keeps your own Apple ID, and every entry travels through your own iCloud with Apple's CloudKit sharing — no Baton account and no Baton server. A grandparent or nanny with an iPhone can join too.

The Today screen shows the last feed, which side is next and the last diaper, so the incoming parent knows where things stand without waking anyone. Each entry records who logged it. Night mode is warm and dim, and the big buttons sit in the bottom half of the screen for one-handed use. Sync usually takes a few seconds with both apps open; in the background iOS decides when Baton may wake. Partner sync is free, and your partner never has to pay.